Neko

when achilles cried for death, it was apollo who had mercy

first posted on tumblr in nov. 11, 2021! i remember writing this immediately after my annual re-read of the song of achilles. very heavily inspired by louise glück's "the triumph of achilles", of course. i also annually re-read that poem. anyways, i hope to return to this poem again (as i do with the song of achilles) and revise it as i get older (and, hopefully, wiser)!


even the gods stirred, almost feared
the grief of achilles who was almost god
he who was half-ocean, borne
of primal seafoam, the origin of love

in his arms, the part of him that was mortal:
the once tender patroclus, reduced now
to lifeless limbs what once were strong hands
for reigning in he who was half-ocean

almost god and still, he held him delicately then,
patroclus who was captain of achilles,
like a flower that favored the fullness of the sun
and the quiet intrigue of a westerly wind

achilles had had a choice once –
to be almost god, or to be almost mortal
his mistake was choosing to be a hero
like his mortal brothers in search of godhood

there was no heroism now, not when the part
of him that was mortal lay a corpse,
collateral of a war destined to outlive him,
a grief far too strong to make room for guilt

when achilles, best of the greeks,
prayed to the gods and offered the half of him
that was ocean, the divine half of him left,
it was apollo who answered

the whisper of an arrow, a blessing, it hits
the heel? the chest? history forgets
and achilles, who was almost god, now
choosing the half of him that was mortal

even the gods feared the half of him
that could rewrite destiny, death
is a mercy even the gods could not afford,
but achilles was no god –
he was half-ocean and half-patroclus